Browsing Tag

suspense

Publishing

Digging Deeper into the Conflict

Chapter 9 of Extra Innings: The Diamond Thieves starts off with the following:

It was curious how no obstacles arose when Skip proposed what he called the “T.J. contract” to Jonas and the mob.  They all agreed.  It was equally strange that kidnapping the mob’s “ball-retriever” was so easy.  Slave, as he was called, immediately took off running to fetch Jimmy’s fly ball.  As he stepped into the street and reached down to pick up the baseball, a whispered voice called out to him.  Panicked, the boy froze still. 

What is this?  Cliff Notes?  The original version of Extra Innings devoted pages to exactly how this scene unfolds and then I went and revised it to this extremely abridged version.  Obviously, you can probably tell by my tone that I’m not happy with this.  There is so much underlying potential to build suspense and wrestle with conflict.  So this week I am digging deeper into this particular incident and bringing it more to life for the reader.  Although I’m a little constrained on time, my goal is to get it done by Sunday.  We shall see.  I will keep you all posted and maybe provide a brief snippet of the finished copy.  Stay tuned and wish Jimmy, Billy & Skip luck as they try and escape the confrontation they receive from Jonas and his boys.

Oh yeah … and for those of you who were following … I will continue with the Chapter Summaries as well.

 

Publishing

Kidnapping the Slave

In the midst of my lumbering through these chapter summaries I recognized a major opportunity area at the beginning of Chapter 10 when the boys kidnap Slave from “the mob” (their opposing team). I won’t go into any depth here since that would only eradicate the juiciness and suspense. I just wanted to share with everyone how eye-opening and a bit saddening it was to realize and area of Book 1 still needs further development. So onward I go with adding a new piece to Book 1 (The Diamond Thieves) and I apologize to the fans who’ve already completed Book 1 and will miss out on the additional drama between Jimmy & Billy’s team and “the mob.”